The "How To Man" Weekend Intensive
Break Through Insecurities, And The Feelings Like You Aren’t Good
Enough... And Step Into A New Life Of Clear Confidence
That Comes From Your Deepest Core
Develop Overwhelming Sexual Confidence That Women Can Feel From The Moment She Looks Into Your Eyes, And That Lets Her Know Right Away That She Is Talking To A Desirable Man
Learn The “Self-Made Man’s Secrets” Of Financial Freedom, And Gain
The Peace Of Mind That Comes From Knowing That You Can Secure Your Future
Become The Kind Of Man Who Friends, Family, Co-Workers, And Lovers
Respect And Look Up To... Not For What He Does, But For Who He Is
Through And Through
Create Intimate Relationships With Women That Are Sexually Charged, Passionate, Authentic, And Openly Happy & Fulfilling
Dear Friend,
After nearly 10 years of working with thousands of men to overcome their darkest insecurities and achieve their brightest dreams for sexual confidence, intimacy, and love… Here is what I have learned:
==> Men want to be accepted and respected by WOMEN as a MAN.
==> Men crave the adoration and support of a truly good woman to sex them, partner with them, and love them.
==> Men have a deep, elemental yearning at their core for greater self-understanding.
==> Men are frustrated by the soul-drowning tsunami of bullshit that shouts at them everywhere about what they need to DO in order to be a “real man,” get laid, make millions, have bigger muscles, a bigger dick, and "win" at life… and yet we still manage to find nothing that feels true about what it means to be a better man and how to achieve it.
Good news/bad news time:
The good… I’m going to share with the most powerful Truth that I have found for becoming one of the very rare men that has ALL of these things in his life...
The bad… You are not going to like hearing it, because it is going to make you face some unpleasant shit about who you are and what you’ve been doing (or not doing) with your life.
I first heard this from my mentor and dear friend, Nathan Charles, and it rocked my world and changed my life in ways that I am still discovering, and growing, and LIVING from:
“If You’re Not Getting What You Want From Your Life,
It’s Because You’re Not The Man Who Gets Those Things”
Blindingly obvious, right?
Clearly, if you don’t got ‘em, it means you didn’t get ‘em.
Here’s the deeper meaning:
You will NEVER get these things in your life by TRYING TO GET THEM… which is what every other guy tries to do, and what every product from beer brands, to books, to body-spray promises to magically deliver.
Unfortunately, it’s the equivalent to trying to get rich by buying lottery tickets.
The only way to get these things that we, as men, most deeply want from life, is to…
And that, my friend, can be some scary work. Work that most men simply aren’t willing to do.
Why?
Because when you try to get that thing that eludes you, all that’s on the line… all that you are risking… is not getting the thing.
But when you work on becoming the man that gets the thing, then it’s YOU that is on the line.
And most men simply don't have the balls to go there.
The awful, ironic part of this, is that in their short term fear of facing this risk, they are missing the self-evident truth of the situation they are in:
That their WHOLE LIFE is on the line anyway.
That the choice to not make a choice is still a choice.
That they are going to DIE someday anyway (and almost certainly sooner than they’d like to). And that NOT doing this work is actually a CHOICE to not live the life that they truly wanted to live... that they COULD HAVE lived…
And not be Captain Obvious here, but: There are no second chances if you don’t GET THIS before you die.
So please pay attention to this next part:
We get sold on the manly idea of "the hero’s journey" of one man facing his demons on his own.
We are ashamed to share the truth of just how lost and hopeless we (all) sometimes feel... because we think that if we can't go it alone, then we are failures at being men.
I mean, it’s bad enough to not feel the respect we yearn for -- how much worse to admit to the world how badly we want it?
But as humans our unique gift that has elevated us above nature is that we can learn from those who went before us. Albert Einstein could not have conceived General Relativity if not for the work of Isaac Newton discovering calculus.
Great men ALWAYS stand on the shoulders of the giants before them.
I would not be the man that I am today if I had not received coaching from Nathan, who in turn, was incredibly lucky to have mentors who coached him.
Wisdom is a lineage.
I was reflecting on this idea of "The Hero's Journey" when I wrote this, and I nearly forgot: A central part of every version of the hero's journey from every culture is that helpers and mentors "appear when the hero is ready" to help him find his way -- Merlin, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Gandalf, Mr. Miyagi -- and yet, as men, we forget...
You do not walk the path towards your personal masculine mastery alone.
For the past couple of years, this topic has come up with increasing frequency from both readers and male friends:
Why don’t you design a program around masculine mastery?
And what I have come to recognize is that this is part of the cycle of my own hero's journey, which always ends with the hero returning from the mountain, the slaying of the dragon, the facing of his deepest internal darkness, and claiming his princess and bringing his discovered wisdom back to the men of his tribe.
Well, I've claimed my Princess...
I'm no different from you -- I struggled on my own path towards fully realizing my place as a man.
I began riddled with insecurity, socially inept, and invisible to women.
Then I found my way into a phase of macho cavalier -- studying sexual mastery, martial arts, and creating a shell of superficial "masculinity" to hide my fear (and my Truth) from the world. And I'll tell you what: I got good at it.
I didn't heed the call of my own hero's journey until I was 39... until mentor's appeared to guide my way.
This material is still edgy and real for me. And so I reached out to my own brothers for help, and called my own "Gandalf" mentor, Nathan Charles.
When I asked Nathan for his advice on creating a program like this, I never imagined his reply would be:
“I’d love to co-create that with you.”
Honestly, like all men living deeply on their purpose, Nathan has an incredibly full schedule of work, purpose, play, and family time.
It is no exaggeration when I say that many powerful men (many that you have probably heard of) seek him out for counsel.
So while I hoped he might show up as a guest speaker, it never occurred to me that he’d want to teach alongside of me. What I hadn’t considered was this simple truth:
Mentorship really is a sacred responsibility to pay forward. When you are living this way because another man helped you up, you simply can’t avoid the passionate calling to bring others up too.
When Nathan first agreed to run this program with me, I knew we’d have to create the page you are now reading, and that we’d have to somehow communicate the importance of this work to the men that we hope will join us.
So I asked him to jot down his first thoughts on what the program would look like.
If you’re like me, for years you practiced being a man.
Pretty simple: You looked at the examples around you, good, bad or ugly, and you did your best to conform to those examples.
You practiced, year after year, to be someone other than yourself.
To be a “real man”, you have to learn how to be more yourself. In fact, the better you get at being you, the more of a real man you are.
Scratching your head?
Here’s why:
Because everyone -- media, school, your friends, women -- everyone has been explicitly or implicitly telling you that a “real” man has this or that quality that you LACK.
They say, “you need to be strong but sensitive, courageous, powerful but not overbearing, confident, muscular, shut up, sit down, do this, do that…”
“Real man” doesn’t mean “fake bullshit.”
Real means, truly, actually, REAL.
Every message you’ve ever gotten about “real man” is some form of B.S. message like, “you should conform to my idea of who you ought to be.” It’s a bunch of random people who don’t actually know, making up crap about who you are supposed to be so that they can placate their own insecurities, and feel safer in their own self-deceit.
When this concept popped for me I thought I might faint.
All this effort, for years, to please my parents, my girlfriend, to be impressive, to succeed, to be more honest, more impeccable, to honor my desires, to be emotionally sensitive, to be strong, to man up, to suck it up, everything--all that effort was a complete, total, counter-productive WASTE OF TIME.
That’s the good news -- the truth will set you free, and the truth is simple.
Don’t misunderstand me -- there is nothing wrong with all the positive qualities of manhood like strength, courage, decisiveness, leadership...
The problem is that you can never become a man by running around trying to be those qualities for someone else. On their authority. And that's the difference that actually makes the difference.
Just to be clear:
Trying to “be a real man” in order to
please, prove something, impress,
put down, or win over, anybody else is fake
Fake men seek approval and avoid criticism
Real men accept criticism and approval with equanimity and curiosity
Fake men chase rainbows and waste their time trying to “get it right”
Real men know what is right and simply do it
Fake men compensate for their perceived inadequacies, annoying people,
and driving away what they most want: love, respect and belonging
Real men know they are adequate, whole and complete; they attract high quality women and friends
Fake men have trouble fitting in and feel uncomfortable
Real men fit themselves in, have no trouble being alone, and have no trouble in groups
Fake men lack confidence in themselves and their decisions
Real men make decisions confidently and accept all of the consequences
Fake men are out of touch with their real emotions and truth, they are in a “parts war”
Real men can handle all of their emotions, as well as the emotions of others
Fake men collapse when faced with a big challenge
Real men grow when faced with a big challenge
Fake men base their lives and actions on fear, seeking outer approval and success
Real men base their lives on deep truth and love
Fake men don’t know their deepest truth
Real men never forget their deepest truth
Fake men fade into the background in fear of being noticed, or puff themselves up
for fear of being not noticed
Real men are powerfully present and take command when they can be of service
Fake men are distant, checked-out lovers
Real men are passionate, sensitive, commanding lovers
Becoming a “real man” is to master the process of self-authentication as it is lived in your own life.
There is no “goal”, like “oh, now I’m a real man”. You master a process, and in living that process, you reduce your “fake” time and increase your “real” time.
So you might have guessed where this is going:
Because we men have practiced being “fake men” for years, we don’t just get to wake up one day “real men”. All that practice at being fake slows us down, trips us up, confuses us with layers of old crap.
Not only that, but everyone around us: our boss, our parents, other men -- everyone expects us to keep being fake. Alone in your life, it is almost impossible to break free into your “real man” because everyone expects you to keep being fake! That’s nothing to whine about, it’s just a fact.
It took me a couple of years to even get the concept of “self-authentication”, of de-programming myself from the impossible endless misery of pleasing people.
Self respect is worth the work.
"Whatever there be of progress in life comes
not through adaptation but through daring."
- Henry Miller
Alex and I have each spent years in the trenches, overcoming the pervasive cultural programming that turns us into plastic people-pleasing zombies. Or emotionally numb asshole zombies. Or whichever program of fake you got stuck with as an innocent kid.
Because Alex and I are pioneers, we went to extremes to discover and verify our own truth, and to practice living by that truth. I spent seven years leading a men’s group, I’ve done dozens of workshops, taught thousands of men, spent countless hours reading, writing, discussing, meditating, practicing, testing and learning.
Alex became a master martial artist, spent decades investigating love and freedom, and launched his Revolutionary Sex brand to help men grow as lovers.
These simple truths about manhood do not come secondhand, although we both have many incredible teachers to thank. Nor did we simply make them up. These truths come from decades of practice, consideration and testing.
Because becoming a real man is important, and because today many more men are ready to become free and happy in their own self-authenticating power, we put our heads together and collaborated.
Alex and I are hosting a weekend intensive program to help you master the process of becoming and being a real man, if that is something you are ready for. There’s more about that below, but first...
** Not every man is ready to become real -- the process takes commitment, courage and most of all, you have GOT to be be FED UP with being “fake”.
If you are still comfortable with being a “fake man”, then you are in the majority -- take a look around you, and you will see that 98% of men are willing to settle for some version of “fake”.
Right now is the time to make up your mind about how you want to live rest of your life:
How much more time are you willing to devote to practicing “fake”, to pleasing people, to trying to look good, to all the one hundred eleven distractions from being real?
Here’s what Nathan and I are committed to you getting from this program:
You will have experiences that will change your life. You will be challenged. You will not like all of it.
But you will get real results.
**
You will gain command of the masculine principles that attract and keep high quality women -- naturally, authentically, and enjoyably -- and fuel powerful SEXUAL PERFORMANCE
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You will leave this program confident, as a completely aligned, authentic, and integrated "real" man, prepared to play a bigger game with your life, & filled with the SOCIAL CONFIDENCE that you need to succeed
**
You will get a four-point plan for discovering and living your most important priorties (this one exercise will completely change the way you relate to your own motivations and give you clear-headed decision making skills that set you apart from other men)
**
People will comment on the positive changes they see in you
**
You will gain respect from other men, from women, and for yourself
**
You will feel ease and confidence with your masculinity
This full two day program will take place in Phoenix, AZ on April 11-12
There are two reasons why you should pull the trigger on this IMMEDIATELY...
1) We are offering a $100 early bird discount of $397 ONLY until March 17th
2) There are only 45 seats in the venue. We WILL sell out on this event. I have no way of knowing if that will happen quickly or not, but if you want to secure your spot, you should act quickly.
Once you register, you'll be sent an email with travel, hotel, and venue details. We have negotiated a very good rate at the hotel of $108.99/night. Our support team will be happy to answer any questions you may have along the way (and yes, you should drive to see Sedona and Oak Creak Canyon while you're in Arizona).
Click below right now to reserve your ticket and we will see you in Phoenix in April!
Social Confidence
Navigating Social Conflict in a way that is clear, manly, and does not require escalation or making others lose face
Dealing with attractive women and the skills and mindset necessary to maintain your frame and confidence under the social pressure of your own attraction. (This is the issue that sabotages social situations for so many men, and it's essential to learn how to overcome it in order to feel whole as a man)
The simple social intelligence distinction that eliminates shyness, introversion, or social anxiety. Many introverted men resort to "faking it" or tricks in order to "overcome" what they see as a social liability. That's a mistake. When you do the work to integrate your introversion as a congruent part of your masculinity, others (including attractive women) will do the work to be social with YOU
Capturing The Heart Of A Great Women
Masculine presence and creating sexual tension with women without resorting to lines, techniques, or transactional efforts at trying to come across as someone you are not (and don't need to be to get women sexually interested in you)
Sexual confidence and learning to have fun and ease with the sexual tension you create with women, and The Pleasure Of Being Confident In Your Sexual Performance.
Being a man with women should be an enjoyable experience for you.
Maintaining attraction, passion, and devotion from a woman in relationship. The bad news for so many relationships is that this can't be faked. The good news is that you won't have to fake it when you leave this workshop
Financial Freedom
This is NOT a business seminar and we are not guaranteeing "you'll make millions," (as Nathan says: "You can only influence how much you earn, but you are in complete control over how much you contribute")... but you can dramatically improve your financial circumstance and ability to accomplish more by applying these masculine principles:
Overcoming "laziness" by connecting your efforts to your deepest values and prioritizing "focused rejuvenation"
Supercharging productivity by controlling context and understanding "planning mind" and "doing mind"
Prioritization and the positive "No"
Discovering and understanding how to value your gifts for contribution
Confidence & Self Trust
The deepest work of this weekend intensive will focus on the foundation stones of building true confidence, not merely the temporary high of circumstantial confidence...
Self Trust and creating the habits of strengthening your bond with yourself
Self acceptance and understanding self criticism in it's constructive and destructive terms so that you can move past your negative self talk and stop suffering. Self acceptance is a pre-requisite for growth and a central theme of this workshop
We will be actively work-shopping and engaging in powerful exercises that create confidence in every aspect of life: love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, authenticity, and creativity
Here's what you are getting when you join us in April...
An intensive weekend of self-reflection, peer-reflection, exercises, techniques, and mentor guidance in discovering your deepest truth
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A clear roadmap and methodology for understanding exactly how to be a better man and stepping into the fullness of your manhood, with confidence and masculine ease
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A Community Of Men who will stand with you shoulder-to-shoulder as brothers on your path. Many of the men you meet on this weekend will become life-long friends
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Ongoing Support: Access to our private Facebook group where we can hold each other accountable and make sure that we stay clear on our path as men. Nathan and I have committed to spending time each week inside of this private gathering area
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Ongoing Trainings: There will be additional trainings, webinars, and live events as part of the "How To Man" curriculum to dig deeply in particular areas of manhood. You will enjoy priority ticketing, deep discounts, and often complimentary access to these future programs
Our Guarantee:
If you join us in Phoenix, and after the program, you feel, for any reason, you have not received the value you expect, we will immediately refund your entire tuition PLUS $200 from our own pockets, no questions asked.
Are You Ready To Join The Brotherhood Of Men...
Or Will Another Man Claim Your Seat?
There's simply no other training that could ever promise you the powers and confidence that you're going to gain at the How To Man Weekend Intensive.
After How To Man you'll have the confidence and self trust to create the life you want, filled with purpose, freedom, financial ease, and love.
It doesn't matter if you're still uncertain of who you are, if you struggle to have women take you seriously as a man, or you feel weak or afraid right now (Nathan and I both started exactly in that place)... How To Man will give you the proven roadmap to become the man can handle ANY situation that life throws at you with masculine confidence.
And you will also become a part of our private community -- joining a brotherhood of lifelong friends that will support you on your new path of confidence and freedom.
We're committed to you taking this chance on yourself:
Even if you don't believe yet that this program can deliver, if you come to Phoenix and don't 100% agree that How To Man fulfills every promise on this page and then some - and if having total confidence in yourself as a man isn't worth it to you - you'll not only get every penny back for your ticket... but also an additional $200 in cash from our own pockets.
Our friend Joe Polish likes to say that, "Confidence feels great; courage doesn't... But if you act with courage often enough, you'll become confident."
That’s it. You’re either ready or you’re not.
Love to the men,
Alex & Nathan
